Slow Season’s Greetings

Japanese Winter Scene
Negishi, woodblock, public domain image

Dear Member:

Whether you’re painting yourself blue and dancing nude around a mid-winter bonfire, or chopping down trees and hanging sparkly things on them, all of us at the Institute wish you a slow and sophisticated holiday.

Keeping to the Slow Way at this time of year can be a challenge. People are in a hurry. If rushaholism is not treated correctly, it can lead to gettingthingsdoneits. In Heather Braithwaite’s book, Your Slow Self. She advises: take a moment for yourself; be quiet, breathe, and relax.

Just this month the Rompshire Police arrested dozens of people for hurrying with intent to get things done.  But instead of being sent for reeducation with Heather Braithwaite, Mistress of Languid Studies, they are first admitted to the medical wing under the care of Dr. Emile Lenteur.

Dr. Lenteur’s chocolate therapy is having remarkable results. Physicians now believe that the cause of rushaholism is a bacterium, and not mental imbalance as previously thought.

The secret is seventy-five percent dark chocolate or twice-daily doses of Dr. Lenteur’s Chocolate Cure for Rushaholics. The results are astonishing. After a short course of chocolate, patients are able to enjoy a few calm  minutes. And that is the first step on the slow path to not much.

Thank you for being one of us.

Yours in slowness,

Amanda Gladly, Secretary

International Institute of Not Doing Much

Should golf be legal?

lady golferRompshire County Council met in Dampford Town Hall on Friday to propose lifting the ban on golf.

Chief Inspector Roger Fumble of the Rompshire Constabulary believes responsible golfing among consenting adults should be legal throughout the County of Rompshire.

Recent polls have shown that attitudes are changing and opposition to golf is declining.

Continue reading “Should golf be legal?”

Help wanted: professional vacationer



  • Vacation in luxury locations: secluded tropical islands, castles in the mountains, and sumptuous estates
  • Report on your vacation by postcard at three-month intervals
  • Travel slowly by  yacht, sedan chair, or elephant. However, occasionally you may have to suffer flying by private airplane
  • Delegate any unpalatable social events or over energetic activities to one of your immediate staff.

Continue reading “Help wanted: professional vacationer”

Slow News Update

button of slow party

Slow Party Platform

With the upcoming elections soon to be upon us, the Slow Party has finally announced its position on the economy, education, crime, international relations, and defense. Read about it here. Vote Slow.

The Pie of Troy

The IINDM history department has just finished translating an ancient text, The Pie of Troy, documenting a conversation between the Greeks and the Trojans. Learn about this new discovery here.

In other slow news

The Society for the Promotion of International Languorousness (SPOIL) awarded Arthur Bing-Chumply a research grant of an undisclosed figure.

His research will be focused on producing the most comfortable sofa known to mankind. Research volunteers should apply in person at the Institute.


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